


I'm Henry the 8th I Am

by bella8876



Series: 30 days of Sterek drabbles [22]
Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Derek is not ok, Hallucinations, Laura is not alive, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-04-10
Updated: 2013-04-10
Packaged: 2017-12-08 02:04:37
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,086
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/755711
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bella8876/pseuds/bella8876
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He didn't even know it was happening at first. He'd catch a glimpse of long dark hair at the grocery store and have to bite his lip to keep from calling out her name. Sometimes he'd walk into a room and catch the fleeting scent of her perfume clinging in the air.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I'm Henry the 8th I Am

**Author's Note:**

> Day 22 - 30 Days of Sterek
> 
> Prompt Picture Credit: 
> 
> This is...I don't even know. I had nothing for today. It was 12:30 and I was ready to give up and go to bed. I even put the computer away then I got this idea and 4,000 words later we're here. Where ever here is. This is so completely not beta'd. I'll look over it in the morning when I'm not dead.

He didn't even know it was happening at first. He'd catch a glimpse of long dark hair at the grocery store and have to bite his lip to keep from calling out her name. Sometimes he'd walk into a room and catch the fleeting scent of her perfume clinging in the air. 

But that was normal it was all a part of the grieving process if the therapist CPS had forced him the see after the fire was right. For months even after they moved to New York he thought he'd seen his family everywhere. Saw a woman he thought was his mother buying a coffee at Starbucks. A man he was convinced was his older brother Michael jogging through the park one morning. He'd even followed a young girl over 20 blocks one day, positive it was his little sister Mel until she'd turned around and told him that she had mace and knew how to use it. 

So he didn't think anything of it when it started happening more and more often. He was stressed out between the Alpha Pack sniffing around and Gerard still on the loose. Most of all he just missed her. He missed his older sister. He missed his Alpha. He knew she'd know what to do when he didn't, knew she'd make the right choices when he hadn't. 

Then he started hearing her. In his head. Which he knew wasn’t exactly a sign of pristine mental health, only the things that she was saying, they weren’t exactly…wrong. 

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

_“You need to find an actual place to live Derek. You know with running water and electricity, and not, you know, Ebola carrying rats”_ And yeah he’d only seen the one rat but that didn’t mean there weren’t more, and it would be nice to be able to just walk down the hall to a bathroom and take a shower and not have to go out into the woods and bathe in the stream or break into the high school locker room at night. So he found a condo, one of those old converted warehouse loft things. 

He’d stood in the middle of the empty space, the sound of refrigerator humming in the background and took what felt like the first deep breath in ages. _“Not bad little bro, the giant hole in the wall’s a nice touch.”_ He heard and snorted, resisting the urge to tell her it was a fixer upper and there was a reason he’d gotten it so cheap. Besides knowing his luck, someone would have gone through the wall at some point anyway, better it’s not there to provide an obstacle in that eventuality. _“You know you’re going to have to buy furniture now,”_

Derek bought furniture. He bought couches and chairs and plush carpets and enormous floor pillows. He bought a giant flat screen tv, surround sound, gaming console, and blu-ray player. He bought a mattress and a bedroom set for his room, then went back the next day and bought another, loading it into the second bedroom and wondering what color comforter Isaac might like best. 

_“Blue,”_ Laura whispered in his head. _“Like his eyes.”_

When it was all finished he crashed on the couch and leaned back, wondering why nothing really felt all that different. _“Because it’s still empty you idiot,”_ Laura said and Derek could practically hear her rolling her eyes. _“Do you ever remember a time when our house was empty growing up? You need to start treating your pack like a family Derek. Because that’s what they are. And maybe then this can become a home and not just a house.”_ Derek sighed because she was right. She was always right and it was getting easier and easier to just listen to her and not question it. 

“ _And get your feet off the coffee table, what were you raised by wolves?”_ Derek pulled his feet off the coffee table and groaned at the ridiculous comment. She’d used that on him all the time in New York when he was acting particularly uncivilized and no matter how ridiculous it was it had made him smile. Every time. 

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

The first couple of times everyone was over it was awkward and stilted and no one was quite sure what to do with the space or Derek. Those were the times Laura wouldn’t shut up. Going on and on about how he had no actual interpersonal skills and how she couldn’t believe they were actually related. The third time Derek was ready to give up when Stiles burst into the loft holding a hand full of DVD’s and an arm full of junk food. 

“Pizza’s on it’s way. I just ordered a couple of meat lovers for all the carnivores in the house,” he dumped the grocery bags in Derek’s confused arms then turned to the television. “And I’m sorry but I just can’t take having this ridiculous television here, knowing that it’s not being appreciated. So Marvel marathon or DC?” 

Isaac and Scott smiled hesitantly, sparking a debate between the Avengers and Batman as Stiles turned a soft smile on Derek. “Dude, there’s ice cream in one of those bags. Don’t let that shit melt.” Derek nodded dumbly and turned to the freezer to unload everything before he even realized he was doing it. 

_“I like that one,”_ Laura practically purred in his ear and Derek groaned, dropping his forehead against the side of the fridge because that was literally the last thing he needed in his life. 

Months went by and things got better. The pack started dropping by without bothering to wait for an invitation. It wasn’t uncommon to get home and find Stiles sitting at the dining room table alternating between homework and research while Scott and Isaac destroyed his living room during their epic Wii bowling matches. 

Most of the time he’d just start dinner then sit down at the table to peak at what Stiles was working on. Which generally led to Stiles asking him questions and Laura answering them for him. Everything was going well. Which is of course when it all started going wrong. 

It started out innocently enough. Derek was in the kitchen making chili, trying to remember his mom’s family recipe. Laura wasn’t helping. _“You’re putting in too much cumin,”_ she said. 

“I’m putting in just the right amount of cumin thank you very much,” Derek said back. 

“Ok,” Stiles said from the doorway and Derek froze and turned around. “I’m sure you are. What the hell is cumin?” 

“I—“ Derek sputtered because he’d said that out loud. He’d talked back to Laura. Out loud. Which was not ok on pretty much any level, especially when he thought about it and realized he’d been doing it for a while. This was just the first time he got caught. “It’s a spice,” Derek said when Stiles raised an eyebrow at him. “Here, taste this.” He practically shoved the spoon in Stiles’s mouth and watched as he tasted it. 

“It’s good,” Stiles smiled reassuringly at him. “You’re right, just the right amount of cumin.” 

“Thanks,” Derek turned back to the stove. He could feel Stiles standing in the kitchen entryway and forced himself to relax and remain calm. 

“Derek?” Stiles asked and Derek grunted over his shoulder. “Are you ok?”

“Fine,” Derek turned around and smiled. “Dinner should be ready in a few minutes.” 

Stiles nodded, eyeing Derek a bit skeptically but backed out of the kitchen and walked into the living room. “I play winner,” he announced and Derek’s shoulders relaxed slightly. 

_“Smooth,”_ Laura scoffed at him. _“Now he thinks your insane.”_

“Maybe I am,” Derek said to the empty kitchen before turning back to his chili. 

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

He showed Isaac his room later that night. Partly because he thought Isaac might finally be ready, and party because if he had someone around 24/7, he’d be less inclined to give into his delusions. 

He held his breath while Isaac took in the desk in the corner and the chest of drawers and the plus mattress with the light blue comforter. Isaac ran his fingers over every surface before turning to Derek and asking when he could move in. 

“Whenever you want,” Derek said sincerely and Isaac launched himself at the older man, pulling him into a rib crushing hug. It was over almost before it began but Derek felt something settle in his chest. And that’s when he saw her, out of the corner of his eye standing by Isaac’s bed, her hand running over the soft comforter before she blinked out of existence. 

“Derek?” Isaac asked, his voice concerned and confused and Derek clapped him on the back and asked if he needed help packing up. 

It happened more and more after that. She’d stay longer and longer every time. Sitting on the couch while they watched TV, leaning against the kitchen counter as he cooked, leaning up against the edge of his bed when he tried to go to sleep. 

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

He went to Deaton after a couple of weeks. “I think I’m being haunted,” Derek gritted out as Laura sang the fiftieth verse of Henry the 8th into his ear. She’d started it the night before when Derek asked her if she was a ghost. She thought it was hilarious. Derek did not. 

“Right now?” Deaton raised an eyebrow and looked to Derek’s right. He felt his breath catch, waiting to see if Deaton could see her too, if he would recognize her for what she was, but his eyes passed right over where she was standing and Derek swallowed around a lump in his throat. 

“At the loft,” Derek lied. “Is there any way to tell?” 

Deaton nodded and pulled down a book and small vial of green powder. “There’s a spell in there that will reveal a spirit. If there is one.” 

“Thanks,” Derek said gruffly, taking the book and the vial and walking to the door. 

_“Fifty second verse, same as the first!”_ Laura crooned as she followed him out. 

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

He followed the instructions exactly. Drew the circle, lit the candle, said the latin, then took the pink powder and blew it right into Laura’s face. Nothing happened. She offered him a small smile and finally stopped singing Henry the 8th. _“I’m not a ghost Der,”_ she said, and she actually sounded a bit bad about it. 

“Yeah,” Derek nodded. “I figured.” 

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

Derek learned quickly the best way to deal with the hallucination was to just accept it. There was not fighting it. She wasn’t a ghost so he couldn’t exercise her. And aside from her Patrick Swayze impersonation she hadn’t done anything to hurt him. In fact she’d helped him. 

He was now a functioning member of society again. He had a home, he had a pack. He had a family. 

And then he started to forget. Forget that no one else could see her. Forget that she was supposed to be dead. 

Laura leaned over the edge of the couch, watching Stiles’s ass as he walked into the kitchen to get more popcorn. “Seriously?” Derek asked and Laura turned to him and smirked. 

_“Oh please don’t pretend you don’t do it too.”_ She rolled his eyes. 

“You’re ridiculous,” Derek rolled his eyes. 

“You’re the one who ate almost the whole first bowl,” Stiles protested coming back in the room. 

“I wasn’t talking to you,” Derek sighed grabbing another handful of popcorn. 

Stiles looked around the room confused. “Then who were you talking to?” he asked. 

Derek opened his mouth to say, _”Laura, obviously,”_ but she was shaking her head frantically at him and he swallowed the words. “No one, never mind. Watch the movie.” 

Derek un paused it and stared at the television. He could feel Stiles’s eyes on him for the whole second half of the movie. Then again he could _feel_ Laura’s eyes on him too. And it felt so real, everything she did and said felt so real to him, but he knew it wasn’t. And if she wasn’t real, Derek was starting to get worried about what else might not be. 

Derek draped an arm over the back of the couch, his fingers dropping lightly onto Stiles’s neck and his whole body practically sagged in relief. Stiles was real. Derek could touch him, could feel him, could hear Stiles’s heart rate pick up at the skin on skin contact and he pressed a bit harder, sliding his fingers into the short hairs at the nape of his neck. 

Stiles hummed around a mouthful of popcorn and leaned back into the touch and Derek turned to Laura, to see what she thought of this but she was gone. And he felt horrible how happy that made him. 

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

She came back. She always came back. But Derek realized now that he could make her go away. All he had to do was touch someone real. A hand on Isaac’s shoulder might do it, or even a squeeze of Scott’s wrist. But it was hit or miss with them. Never with Stiles. One touch and he could make her disappear for hours. A brush of fingertips when he handed Stiles a soda, a guiding hand at the small of his back, a squeeze to the back of his neck. 

Derek had taken to sitting next to him all the time now during movie night, connecting the two of them from hip to knees, his fingers running lightly through Stiles hair. Sometimes after movie night she’d be gone for days. 

By an unspoken rule they didn’t talk about. Stiles didn’t ask, Derek didn’t tell. But he never pushed Derek away, never shied away from his touch. He even started touching back. Little gestures, a hand on Derek’s hip when he passed behind him in the kitchen, a brush of elbows when they sat next to each other at the table. Those were the times when she stayed away the longest. 

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: 

Then came midterms and Christmas holidays and between school work and family obligations Derek didn’t see Stiles for almost two weeks. He got the occasional text message and a came home two days before Christmas to a brightly wrapped package at his front door with a hastily scribbled note that said, “Sorry I missed you.” 

Derek stared at the box for almost an hour before Laura finally showed up. _“Are you going to open it?”_

Derek barely spared her a glance before the tore open the wrapping and looked down to see the boxed sex of The Game of Thrones books. Stiles had forced him to sit through a marathon a couple of weeks ago and Derek had been hooked by the second episode. They could talk about it for hours and it always ended up with Stiles saying, “But there’s this part in the books…ugh I don’t want to like give anything away.” 

Derek ran his hand over the cracked spines realizing this were actually Stiles’s personal copies and he smiled at that, wondered if he was a book mark kind of guy or a fold the corner over guy. He wondered if he’d find notes in the margins in Stiles’s messy handwriting or even highlighted passages. Derek saw how Stiles treated his school books. 

_“They even smell like him,”_ Laura said and Derek took a deep breath, his smile widening and Laura rolled his eyes. _“You are so far gone I almost can’t even tease you about it.”_ Derek turned to glare at her and she smirked. _”Almost.”_

With Stiles gone and Laura back it was easy to fall into the roll he had before. He found himself talking back to her again, forgetting that she wasn’t actually there. A few times when Isaac had been in the room. He’d played it off but he knew that his Beta was worried about him. And for the first time Derek was worried too. 

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

She woke him up in the middle of the night. _“Derek, come on, we have to go, we have to go now,”_ Her tone was so urgent and Derek couldn’t help but think about the last time he’d heard her that panicked. When she’d told him that she had to go back to Beacon Hills. _“Derek come on, now!”_

He jumped out of the bed without a second thought and followed her down the hall and to the door only to hesitate. _“We have to hurry, we don’t have much time. They’ve got Stiles Derek.”_

Derek felt his heart skip a beat and his eyes flooded red and that was all she needed. She motioned for him to follow and lead him out of the building and through the warehouse district. He tried to ask her questions. Who had Stiles, where did they take him, when did they take him, what did they want. But she didn’t answer just kept saying they had to hurry, that they didn’t have time. And he followed her because he’d always followed Laura. 

When they were little she was his impossibly cool older sister. He followed her around school, he followed her out on full moon runs. He followed her to New York and then he followed her back to Beacon Hills even when he said he’d never set foot there again. And now, even after her death he followed her. 

_“Just a little further,”_ She said ducking into one of the access tunnels out by the old train system. 

“Derek!” Stiles’s voice called out, echoing down the tunnel and his steps faltered and he stopped watching Laura run towards the end of the tunnel ahead of him. 

_“Come on,”_ Laura turned around and held a hand out to him even as Stiles called his name again. _“That’s not him Derek, they’re trying to trick you. We don’t have much time. You need to trust me.”_

“Derek!” The voice was getting closer now and Laura looked at him with a mixture of hurt and fear in her eyes. 

_“Derek,”_ Laura pleaded with him. _“I’m your sister.”_

Derek shook his head as the sound of frantic footsteps splashing in the water got closer. “My sister’s dead,” he said softly, for the first time and Laura’s face fell, her mouth opening to protest when suddenly the footsteps were right behind him. 

Stiles’s fingers wrapped around Derek’s wrist and he watched Laura vanish from his sight before he turned around. “Jesus,” Stiles said panting, his eyes raking up and down Derek. “What the hell man? What are you even doing out here? Isaac called me all freaked out, said you took off in the middle of the night. You had him worried sick. You had _me_ worried sick.” The whole time he was scolding Derek his fingers were running up and down his arms, across his chest, checking for wounds, making sure Derek was ok. 

“She said they had you,” Derek told him and Stiles froze, his hands on Derek’s arms as Derek collapsed against Stiles’s, his fingers grasping onto Stiles’s waist, sliding his nose into the crook of Stiles’s neck and taking a deep breath. 

“Who said they had me?” Stiles asked quietly, his hands moving to Derek’s back to keep him in place. 

Derek swallowed hard, tired of hiding it. Ready for this to be over. “Laura.” 

“Laura?” Stiles frowned, the name not registering at first. His pulled away when he figured it out, staring at Derek in shock. “Your sister Laura?” He whispered and Derek nodded. “I don’t—how?”

“I see her. Sometimes,” Derek said and Stiles’s eyes got even bigger. “I know she’s not real, well sometimes I know she’s not really but she said they had you and I couldn’t—I didn’t.” 

“I’m right here,” Stiles pulled Derek close again, let him feel Stiles solid and there against his chest. 

“I think I need to go talk to Deaton,” Derek whispered and Stiles nodded. 

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

“You should have come to me when this started,” Deaton told Derek, but his tone was more sympathetic than scolding as he passed Derek a vial of something that smelled like moldy cheese. He explained how the Alpha’s could mess with your head, manipulate your memories, use them against you. Derek didn’t even remember running into them. Deaton said he wouldn’t have. 

“It was probably a trap,” Stiles whispered in the Jeep as he drove Derek back to the loft. “She was luring you straight to them. I knew something was wrong. I could tell when you started touching me but I didn’t say anything because—“ he chanced a look at Derek who was staring at him in wonder. “I didn’t want you to stop.” 

“It made her go away,” Derek said after a minute, Stiles’s confession hanging in the air. “When I touched you it made her go away for a little while.” 

“Oh,” Stiles nodded, his face falling a little. 

“But also because I wanted to,” Derek clarified and Stiles turned, offering him a small smile. 

“Why?” Stiles asked him. 

“Why did I want to touch you?” Derek asked slowly. 

“No, but we’re going to talk about that later, don’t think we won’t,” Stiles assured him. “Why did it make her go away?” 

Derek thought about it, he’d been thinking about it for a while. “I think it’s because she wasn’t real. And you’re the most real person I’ve ever known.” 

“I’m going to take that as a compliment,” Stiles huffed as they pulled into the loft parking lot. He sat in the car for a minute, the clicking of the engine the only sound for miles around. “Why didn’t you tell anyone?” 

“Cause I wanted it to be her,” Derek admitted. “I wanted so badly for it to be her. And even when I knew it wasn’t, I didn’t care.” 

  
Stiles nodded and turned to him. “I probably would have done the same. If it had been my mom.” He reached across the gear shift and grabbed Derek’s wrist. Squeezing lightly before letting go. 

Derek got out of the Jeep and he wasn’t expecting Stiles to follow him, but then again he never expected Stiles to do any of the things Stiles did. He grabbed Derek’s wrist the second they were out of the Jeep and didn’t let go even when they got back to the loft. Isaac was standing just inside the door and Derek pulled him into a one armed hug. “I’m fine,” he whispered as Isaac whined into Derek’s neck and took a few deep breaths to settle himself down. “Go back to bed, we’ll talk in the morning.” Isaac pulled away reluctantly and went back upstairs. 

Derek pulled the vial out of his pocket and looked at it. “Deaton said to take it in bed,” Stiles reminded him. “You need to sleep so it can fix whatever they messed with up there.” He brought his fingers up to Derek’s temple, his thumb brushing across Derek’s cheekbone softly. 

“Stay with me?” Derek asked and Stiles nodded, heading for the stairs and using the hand still wrapped around Derek’s wrist to pull him along.

He only let go when they got in the room, to toe off his shoes and shed his hoodie and jeans before grabbing Derek’s hand this time, and intertwining their fingers as he pulled them both down onto the bed. Derek swallowed the vial in one gulp and managed to keep it down. 

“Tell me something about Laura,” Stiles whispered, his thumb rubbing back and forth over Derek’s knuckles as they lay facing each other. 

Derek was quiet for a minute and Stiles was afraid he’d fallen asleep when he started to talk. “She was afraid of spiders.” Derek said with an amused smile on his face and Stiles laughed. Once he started talking he couldn’t stop. She loved reading but hated match. She died her hair pink for three months in high school once, his mother had not been amused. She had a huge collection of vinyl that all burned in the fire and when they got to New York Derek would take some of the money he got tending bar every week and go down to this whole in the wall record store and try to buy something he remembered her having from before. They were still somewhere in storage in New York with all her other stuff. 

“She would have liked you,” Derek said softly, his voice sleep heavy by now. 

“I think I would have liked her too,” Stiles offered as Derek drifted off to sleep. 

**Author's Note:**

> I [Tumble](http://www.bella8876.tumblr.com/)   
> therefore I am.


End file.
